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Recalibrating With Friends

Recalibrating With Friends

The best thing in my life right now are my every-three-months visits to my dear friend’s house in Massachusetts. We instituted this idea back in January, and I just got back from my third trip—and I loved every single second of it.

Why are these visits so invigorating?

Not only do I get the fulfillment of having a built-in best friend at my side for a week, but also that of a fellow writer and reader. Additionally, she has an adorable toddler, two lovable dogs, and the friendliest cat I’ve ever known. Aside from that of a romantic partner, literally all of my emotional needs are met. It’s pure bliss.

Another value to these visits, which I’d like to discuss here, are the unexpected benefits I receive from making these trips. 

They’re like a retreat, complete with a Harry Potter-styled guest bedroom that is to die for (thanks, Pottery Barn Teen!). I get away from it all and get to recalibrate my life.

What kind of things get recalibrated?

My work life: Every night, when my friend’s husband gets home and watches their son, my friend and I head downstairs to her basement office and Get. To. Work. We write, edit, revise, brainstorm, pull out our hair, bemoan the writer’s life, feel grateful for this crazy life that is ours. All of it. It’s so much fun working alongside a friend.

My reading life: This is something I began this past week, taking a little time to read every night before bed. Probably because it’s something my friend has recently instituted into her daily life, and it caught on. I haven’t been reading enough lately, which is a travesty for both a writer and normally-fervent reader. 

What did I read? At long last (since I’ve had the book for forever now): As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales from the Making of “The Princess Bride,” by Cary Elwes and Joe Layden. If you’re a fan of the book or the movie (or both, as you should be!), read this book. It’s well worth the journey to explore the rich history of the film and stories from the cast and crew. 

My cosmic life: It mind sound weird to say, but I have a few special friends and family with whom I feel so in sync with that to be in their presence is almost a spiritual experience. I’m so zen and at peace with who I am around them that it feels cosmic. I relish these relationships, but they are few and far between. I also don’t have friends as part of my daily life. I work from home, too, so I’m often lonely. To spend an entire week around a person who sends my spirits soaring is a true gift from the universe.

All in all, I cherish these visits with my friend. I know they won’t last forever as we both grow in life and family, but I’m taking advantage of all they offer right now while they’re here. 

Above everything, I love who I am when I’m with her, and that’s something I need to learn to take home with me. I eat better, feel better, and am better when I’m around my friends. I need to embrace that side of me when they’re not around.

Here’s to great friends and all that they give us!

How do you manage to spend time with your best friends in adulthood? Has your time had to adjust with life changes? How do you benefit from time with that special someone? Share in the comments below!

Recalibrating With Friends

Recalibrating With Friends

The best thing in my life right now are my every-three-months visits to my dear friend’s house in Massachusetts. We instituted this idea back in January, and I just got back from my third trip—and I loved every single second of it.

Why are these visits so invigorating?

Not only do I get the fulfillment of having a built-in best friend at my side for a week, but also that of a fellow writer and reader. Additionally, she has an adorable toddler, two lovable dogs, and the friendliest cat I’ve ever known. Aside from that of a romantic partner, literally all of my emotional needs are met. It’s pure bliss.

Another value to these visits, which I’d like to discuss here, are the unexpected benefits I receive from making these trips. 

They’re like a retreat, complete with a Harry Potter-styled guest bedroom that is to die for (thanks, Pottery Barn Teen!). I get away from it all and get to recalibrate my life.

What kind of things get recalibrated?

My work life: Every night, when my friend’s husband gets home and watches their son, my friend and I head downstairs to her basement office and Get. To. Work. We write, edit, revise, brainstorm, pull out our hair, bemoan the writer’s life, feel grateful for this crazy life that is ours. All of it. It’s so much fun working alongside a friend.

My reading life: This is something I began this past week, taking a little time to read every night before bed. Probably because it’s something my friend has recently instituted into her daily life, and it caught on. I haven’t been reading enough lately, which is a travesty for both a writer and normally-fervent reader. 

What did I read? At long last (since I’ve had the book for forever now): As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales from the Making of “The Princess Bride,” by Cary Elwes and Joe Layden. If you’re a fan of the book or the movie (or both, as you should be!), read this book. It’s well worth the journey to explore the rich history of the film and stories from the cast and crew. 

My cosmic life: It mind sound weird to say, but I have a few special friends and family with whom I feel so in sync with that to be in their presence is almost a spiritual experience. I’m so zen and at peace with who I am around them that it feels cosmic. I relish these relationships, but they are few and far between. I also don’t have friends as part of my daily life. I work from home, too, so I’m often lonely. To spend an entire week around a person who sends my spirits soaring is a true gift from the universe.

All in all, I cherish these visits with my friend. I know they won’t last forever as we both grow in life and family, but I’m taking advantage of all they offer right now while they’re here. 

Above everything, I love who I am when I’m with her, and that’s something I need to learn to take home with me. I eat better, feel better, and am better when I’m around my friends. I need to embrace that side of me when they’re not around.

Here’s to great friends and all that they give us!

How do you manage to spend time with your best friends in adulthood? Has your time had to adjust with life changes? How do you benefit from time with that special someone? Share in the comments below!

Erica Deel

Erica is an author of middle-grade fantasy fiction. She is creating her own "wonderlife" by living out her writing dreams.

1 Comment

John Andreula

4 August , 2019 at 11:36 am

Calibration is so necessary. I’m just getting done doing some myself. One of the things I learned is calibration has got to be consistent. Keep up the growing!

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